just write blindly = feelings

1. Just write nonsense

I reflect on myself three times a day. Indeed, today I reflect on myself, and I feel more and more that I am still a lot worse and need to learn a lot.Although I have worked for a year, I do lack workplace rules and skills, and my ability is still much worse.
I often mention the term "core" engineer to others, but my level is really not enough, not far enough, and I didn't make any progress this week, even though I always wanted to be a core engineer.
In my understanding, it is not necessary to build wheels, but you must have this ability, I always think.
I also know that my level is not high, but I have been working hard.
I don't think you have to be in a big company to show your talent. I really like Northeast China, especially Shenyang.
I really can't accept it. In this environment, what if I don't realize my ideal in the end?
I don't want to think about it, and I don't dare to think that this is the only motivation for me to go back to Northeast China.
The talented Niulanshan has already started to act as a wife.
I am very conflicted.
I have interviewed a leading company in China before. I really don’t know.
It's really hard, even if I've been working for a year.
Today, my mood fluctuates a lot, you may find it funny, but it does fluctuate a lot. When I saw her today, I wanted to laugh happily. This kind of laughter is a kind of heartfelt, Ilike her.I have been introverted for so many years, and I have also been cowardly for so many years.But to her, I really want to say, I really like you.I really like it.Her various criteria for judging the opposite sex you can think of are all in line with mine.Today she also said something sad to me, that is, in the seemingly joking chat, I actually revealed my plan for the next few years. I know she did it unintentionally, but, but, it really touched me.My mid-level goal at work.I don't blame her, she was unintentional. When I first met her, we chatted very casually, saying anything.I also want her to forgive me for being a little narrow-minded tonight.I don't write anymore, the Niulan Mountain at this time made me very confused, and I was worried about talking nonsense.
20220801 Jack ju