Run, open circuit

     Think of going to grandma's house after new year , I am with my mother , I naturally chose to take the mountain road , On the one hand, it is really to save money , On the other hand, I also warn myself that I'm not small , We should bear our due responsibilities .

    I haven't walked the mountain road for many years , In fact, no one has taken the mountain road .    All kinds of weeds are overgrown , There are all kinds of thorns .    At first, I could see almost others at the foot of the mountain .    At that time, I still felt a little guilty .  Because other people's homes are cars and so on , And I have to rely on my parents' money to study ...    But nothing , There are many humiliating things , This thing is just a little uncomfortable for me .    In fact, this is also an immature performance , Or not confident performance .  But I really can't be confident without money ...    Ha ha ha , I can only say that I can do it occasionally .

    Then it was halfway up the mountain , When I was a child, I felt a long way , But I don't think it's far away , Except that the body that hasn't exercised for a long time drips sweat unsuccessfully .    But I have to say that there is no way , Sometimes thorns hang on pants or clothes .  Fortunately, the clothes are thick , And leather shoes , To avoid being scarred .    But in the end, I still encountered a big problem , The exit at the hillside , Equivalent to the only way to climb the mountain , It was blocked by many thorny branches from above , After analysis, there is no possibility to remove these obstacles manually .  But it is absolutely impossible to reverse , Because it's already a lot of trouble to come up , It will take a lot of time to go down .    

    So after climbing the terrain , We decided to take risks , Climb over , Really climb over .    It's about three meters high , But for a man who is full of weeds , thorns , And the wild jungle with dead trees , This is also a big challenge .    Have no choice but to , Danger can only head on .  After some hard work , Although the palm has been stabbed into some spikes , Still resist climbing up . After that, I said that I had been worried that my mother couldn't climb up , I'm going to pull her . She said that climbing mountains is better than me , rejected , Finally, we all went up the mountain safely .    Maybe it was then , I feel really different . Compared with childhood . 

    After that, everything went according to the plan , Just on the way back, we talked about family habits , Speaking of relatives , Speaking of family environment .... As far as I can remember, I have never told my parents so much .    Then when I came back, I couldn't wait for the bus , We also walked for more than an hour , Is also talking about homely .. Speaking of my father , Speaking of my cousin , Speaking of my uncle , Speaking of my aunt , Speaking of my pressure , Speaking of it ......

    At that time, I felt that I was really the feeling that a child from a poor family was in charge of the family as early as possible , Although I'm old enough to get married and have children , As far as rural areas are concerned . But for some special reason , I'm still reading , And family changes , When I should have enjoyed a better life in College , Have to think more ...     

    Far away .   

    As a liberal arts student, I , There is still a little delicate emotion .  Simply put your feelings on things , I'm in the mountains and rivers .    I know this year will be like climbing , Full of hardships , Full of thorns .  I often get hurt on the way , I feel tired , Will feel lonely , Even feel afraid .    But I must grit my teeth and insist , I must arm myself relatively safe , I must put on my solid leather shoes full of years .  There is no road ahead , I have to try , Although it will be full of danger .  Someone will embarrass me , Will trip , I must also try my best to spend （ A symbolic , Because I think I don't make enemies in peacetime , Popularity is not too bad , EQ is ok , IQ is also ok ）.

    But in schools, especially on university campuses , One full of relaxation , entertainment , Be happy , In the hormonal environment of love , I really feel a little out of group from time to time , Even in a campus where the style of study is not so important , I doubt whether I'm nervous , Lonely and tired ！.. 

    I don't remember anything else , I just remember ：   

                 Parents for family , Regardless of illness and body , Choose to continue to work in Guangdong ..    mother 51 year , father 61 year , Tuberculosis surgery two years ago .    There's another one at home 83 My - year-old grandmother  , Alone at home . In father , When grandma should enjoy her family , There's nothing I can do ..

                I called my mother this Tuesday to talk about homely , But they are working , I didn't bother anymore .    after , I called my grandmother , Chatted a little about family . But obviously my grandmother also knew that I cared about them , I'm afraid I'm under too much pressure .    I remember the original words ：“ Just study hard , And qian I , And qian Your old man .....”; Hearing this, I actually choked , But still hold back , When I hung up the phone in the back, I couldn't help crying next to the roof ... This is the first time I call home and cry ..

                Maybe crying Own grievances ！    Maybe it's crying about your incompetence ！   

    But anyway , Sensational, sensational .  On the whole, I'm still learning well according to my plan , Progress , Crawler ... If the plan for yourself is 10 If you divide up , I give myself 8 branch ..

    But in recent days, I feel a little relaxed , Mentally .    Although physically speaking, I'm still learning , But it's not efficient , Goals are too scattered , The goal is too big .      On the other hand, from the external environment , Because compared with myself, I worked very hard , It is inevitable to doubt whether you should take a rest , Mix a ...  

     I thought about this problem seriously today ： I've reserved all the rest time for myself , I also save time for entertainment and relaxation , Although not so reasonable . But think about the back-end basics that are overstocked on the knowledge list , Think about the actual teaching video bought with a lot of money , Think about your current situation .      The process of running must be painful , It's definitely not like playing the game version, which is full of relaxation everywhere , The process of transformation is also painful , Yes, it's pain .  Do what you should , Stick to what you stick to , Care what you care .

    Another annoying thing is that I don't know if I'm under pressure , There is always some strange fire .    And you can't help but see the shortcomings of others , I am helpless , But there's no way ...      Life is not easy , And cherish it ！