Live long to see the true chapter

Once deeply depressed , Struggle to survive , Exactly , Not only to survive , Also thirsty for sunshine .

however , It seems that the ending always backfires , The more you want to believe , The more you get hurt .

In the deepest darkness , Also experienced the worst human nature .

When a person has In the late stages of depression , What is needed to save ？
I have no experience in medicine , however , In my personal experience , Even in the late stages of deep depression , Want to live .
Don't want to open your eyes , I really want to go to sleep , You can have nothing to do with the world . unfortunately , The empty heart wants to die , No gall to bear pain .

So called depression , The light man has no sentimental attachment to the world , But his mind is still healthy ; Heavyweight , No matter to this world , Or no longer have any expectations for themselves , The mind has been seriously damaged .
I have been lectured by my relatives and friends , Relatives , I attribute all my ailments to a state of mind imbalance , Sparser , Call me sick .
and , When I tell my medical record to the doctor , And even Say I don't know you .
There was a time , Once seriously suspected , I am really ill , Or the world Too selfish , A change has occurred .

If I'm really sick , What I have experienced is true , All the pain is real , Once despaired and committed suicide , It is true that there is nothing to love ;
But , As the so-called kind-hearted people around said , It's my own thinking , Then why can't they accept equal treatment from others ;
occasionally , Just feel , It's disgusting , People and things you meet , They all feel disgusted ！

I have met a group of “ Senior youth ", Maybe personal evolution is not enough , Watching what they did , It's like watching a group of knowledgeable people hunt prey with ease , Born to be human , I really don't understand that their cruel nature is due to In the educational process Which link is caused by the error . As if , The pursuit of ability , Or, , The ability to hold oneself , in the course of time People forget The original intention of enlightenment .
He is a loser , I'm really not qualified to talk with others . Xu has personally experienced those damage , therefore , Truly thought , The so-called attack , The spirit is even worse , Because it directly touches the human soul . If the heart is dead , Life may have come to an end .

I just feel hopeless , So by writing , I hope I can find a breathing outlet for myself .
Have been bullied and kept away from the crowd , A person keep oneself to oneself , a word or two , After a few years .
Once I was sick , Be rejected by all kinds of people , Once displaced , Nowhere to stop .
But , People's emotions need an outlet after all , No longer die in silence , In silence . The good news is , A few years , I have experienced both .
The world is warm and cold , Only experienced , To give up .

Since the alarm came , I have been disturbed by a group of strangers , I doubt it , Why on earth did you come .
After graduation , existing 8 Years on , It can be said that it is the best youth time for a girl , All were destroyed .
The irony is , I was the one who was killed , Now , It's also me who looks like a shrew , Others are gentle , It can be regarded as a model of scholars .
I have heard a passage , It looks something like this ： Last , Excellent people will enter a kinder circle …
It's funny , Student time , I have seen such a group of people , the doings , There is no bottom line at all , Is the The paradigm of quantum motion , I can't see how excellent , Not good enough is not bad enough , Now we have entered Hearsay Better circle , as for Good or not , Surely only the people in it know …
Actually, I'm curious , They recall their lives , What kind of feeling will it be ？

whatever, A scum like me is probably unimaginable , Every time I think of them , My eyes will be red with acid .

It took a whole Eight years , I feel that I finally wake up , The funny thing is ,” Maybe “ Because of the alarm ,” Maybe “ It's really been punished by those who have a heart , And was disturbed by all kinds of people .
Think back to the past eight years , I just think what The truth of the world Forget it , Thank God for saying goodbye , in the future , I dare not call the police any more .
When you are in trouble , Anyone can run away , Dislike and abandon ; Any deep feeling , May be drawn to each other in an instant ;

if , What have you learned over the years , That is a new understanding people This creature , Of course , Including myself .

Another new year , I hope to wake up completely this year , I also hope to save my first pot of gold this year . also , All kinds of sundries , All retreat ！

…
My first love paradise A young and beautiful girl After how much despair Only then can we choose to live forever without hesitation …
Maybe it's depression , Once in a while , You will see all kinds of cynicism she has experienced , It's the victim , But in many The cynicism of the good doer in For yourself Speculation , Counterbalance . Maybe , No longer have any illusions about the world , So I chose to end my life in the most extreme way . Her parents may also be sad , however , I think , All for the sake of peace and Choose the person who denounces her , Have no right to mourn , Without suffering from others , Don't persuade others to be good , How dare you say , You can really be tolerant after you experience it ？ What's more? , Everyone has different understanding of affection .
To borrow a word from a writer : Only when people die , People can see the seriousness of things . Is this also a kind of human vice , The suffering of others is always so clear , Isn't worth mentioning …

It was not easy to stay awake , I hope I won't be a good person again Cornered .